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it's odd, isn't it, that i have these special powers, and i don't do anything with them on this journey. i'm funny that way. i think of my person who hiked part of the appalachian trail, who quit her jobs and her normal life with the intention of walking the entire thing (injuries prevented this). but the heart, the desire to do something like that and to not let other things intrude? maybe the purity of this experience is what i want to preserve. funny how i decided that unconsciously. i just went with the flow. i must have been right confused and upset when we set out. oh yes. quite cross, quite lost. earth people often talk about the distinction between something and "the real world." what is the real world, exactly? they say it when you do something *silly* like quit your jobs and wander around; they say it when you go back to school because academia is supposed to be some sort of sheltered safe place that *prepares* you for the real world. it's odd. are these experiences somehow UN-real? are they mediated in some way that makes them less than what the REAL world would offer? or is the real world this terrifying and difficult place that you need armoring against, protection, your best wits about you just to survive it? did i ever live in the real world? or did i just live in the suburbs?
